Scared Straight

I will be the first to admit, I love porn. I like the black, nasty, raw, sweaty ones especially. The other day I was practicing a little self love, relieving some stress. Once reaching my peak, I cleaned up and begin to put all and any evidence away. It's always the one time you forget to eject the porn out of the DVD player, your friends wanna surprise you and watch a DVD. I opened up my CD booklet with my collection of Adult DVD's, and inserted my flick of the day back in its place. I begin to flip through my little book of fun, looking at all the movies I had collected over the years, Chasing The Big Ones, BootyTalk #24, Something About Jack,and Freak , Flows, and Hoes. I realized my porn collection lacked any variety or fetishes. They were all black and straight, with the exception of two gay flicks. I'm not big on gay porn at all, especially. LESBIAN girl on girl action. Lesbian porn freaks me out a little bit to be honest with all the fingering, poking, and jabbing,which brings me to 1994.

As Big Dee Dee would say, The Year:1994, The Place: Northside of St.Louis, Age:12. It was the beginning of a typical Monday night, as my mom gathered her exercise mat and bottled water, and prepared for her weekly aerobics class. My little sister and I sat in the kitchen completing our homework, as my mom rushed from room to room, attempting to be on time for a change. As she prepared to leave she called us to the front room as she stood in the doorway. We knew she was about to lecture us on the safety of staying home alone. My dad often worked nights so we were left home alone on more than one occasion. "Don't open this door for anybody, I don't care who it is. Even if its your Aunt Grace." she said, right before she left and hugged us one by one. My little sister and I raced to the window and peeked out the blinds, watching and waiting until she drove off. Once out of sight, we ran to the kitchen and rushed through the last of our homework.

Earlier that evening my mom brought us home a new VHS tape, and we couldn't wait to watch it. Once we completed our homework we quickly went into the T.V room and plopped down on the couch. I picked up the tape from the VHS rack, and excitedly ripped the shiny plastic off the cover box. I proceeded to put the tape in the VCR, but the tape wouldn't go in. Apparently there was already a tape in there, so I ejected it. I looked at the tape and saw the title read Black & Ghouly. "Ooohh", I said, "This sounds like a scary movie. You wanna watch this instead?" "I don't wanna watch a scary movie." my little sister said. "It'll be fun." I replied. I put the tape back in and pressed rewind. We listened and waited for the tape to stop and I pressed play. I turned off the lights excitedly, to get the extra affect of being scared.

The movie started and the words Black & Ghouly popped up on the screen with green slimy text. We watched the movie intensely as the opening scene began with a black woman with an afro coming out of a kitchen in her bath robe. She suddenly gets a knock at the door and another woman with an afro walks in. They sit on the couch and begin to talk, as the one woman begins to undo the other woman's robe. Eventually they both end up fully naked, and my little sister and I are watching in horror as one of the women begin to eat the other woman's big black hairy coochie. "Oh my god," I said. Mamas a lesbian. My little sister begin to cry. The camera goes up even closer and we can see the slob from the other woman's mouth on the lady's coochie, dripping wet. The loud sound of a car door slamming wakes us up out of the state of shock. Mama's home! I hurrily stopped the tape and turn the lights back. My mom walks through the door as me and my little sister look at her in disbelief. "What's wrong with ya"ll?" she asks. "Nothing were fine," I reply as I get up.

That night scarred me for life. I have been scared straight and only been able to enjoy straight porn every since that terrifying night in 1994. Its a very painful memory.

In case your wondering, we found out later that the tape belonged to my dad. Don't Ask.