A beautiful struggle with ONE's self

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Random Shit

Wow, it's been a week exactly since my last blog update. I have been busy with my-so-called LIFE (I use to love that show). I don't have any one thing to talk about, so I guess I will just shoot the shit to ya.

My weekend was weird and good. Saturday my mom and I had a little spat, which was all her fault might I add. I swear that woman must be going through menopause, because her mood swings are out of control, more than usual. But I digress, she and I had a little fight, and needed to vent, so I tried calling one of my best friends, but she wasn't picking up her cell, so I decided to text her. I texted her the message "MY MOM GETS ON MY FUCKING!!!!!!! NERVES!. About 15 minutes later, I get a phone call from my mother, saying she got my message. "What message?" , I say. "My mom gets on my....you finish the rest." she says. Apparently I texted my mom instead of my friend. All I could mutter was sorry. I'm still bugging from the incident, but I guess it could always be worse.

Sunday I went to church and it felt soooo GOOD. I haven't been to church in a few months if not more. It just felt good to hear the choir sing and be in God's presence. I needed that more than I knew.

I just found out I have jury duty in a few weeks. I am so not looking forward to it. This is my first time being summoned to jury duty and from what my parents and others say, it's a lot of waiting around. Hopefully I'm not picked to be on a trial, maybe I will concoct some crazy story or behavior so I'm not picked.

Last week my beloved TiVo was toasted. It went dead causing me to miss all my favorite T.V shows including the Will and Grace series finale and Desperate Housewives season finale, I'm pissed to say the least. Hopefully I can find it on Itunes or download it or something.

On the brighter side of things, I have a JOB interview today with the state. A nice comfy office job.I haven't been on a job interview in awhile, so I am extremely nervous, but excited about the possibilities of more money and putting my 2 weeks in at the grocery store. I am seriously tired of those fuckas.

Yea that's my hand in the above picture. I was bored at work so I tried to mimic Radio Raheem from Do The Right Thing. I'm right handed, so I had put all that shit on my left hand. I guess this is a subconcious message...



Wednesday, May 17, 2006

I Won SUCKAS!

Man, secretly watching Top Model tonight, I didn't know who was gonna win, but I knew I wanted Danielle to win. Word on the street was Joanie had won, but that was obviously wrong. My sucka for life Danielle is America's Next Top Model and as country as it sounds, I'm HELLA AMPED.

Did the right person win?

RazBerry Ice Tea

Music: Promiscuous Girl by Nelly Furtado

According to my favorite Podcast,
PinkMafiaRadio, Mr. Raz B formerly of B2K, will be making a cameo apperance on the upcoming Season 2 of Noah's Arc, where he will be acting of course. His charactor has a vital role in the episode, which he has already filmed, and YES his character is GAY, but make note Raz B is straight *cough*.

Also for all you true Noah's Arc fans, the DVD of Season One will be released on June 19th through www.LOGOONLINE.com and the Second Season of Noah's Arc will premiere August 9.

Raz B has been making the rounds in the gay community and has even participated in Gay Pride events. I have a few thoughts about this, but I'd rather not say, instead why don't YOU get the ball rolling.


Thankx Steven

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Revelation

The other day I was talking to a good friend of mine and they suggested an idea that I, myself, toyed with awhile back. Why don't you just move up here? Here meaning Chicago. That's not a bad idea,especially since there is nothing keeping me in Saint Louis. I am moving to Chicago. I'm moving to Chicago. WOW. It felt even better to say it aloud. Previously, I had thought about moving to New York, but I thought I'd better start off smaller and gradually make a move to New York, (I'm telling U, that's where I really belong!) My best friend lives in Chicago and a few mutual friends, and everyone is already excited about the possibility of me moving there, including myself.

I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little nervous and scared about moving to Chicago, but this is something I MUST do and HAVE to do for myself and sanity. Fear and uncertainty has held me back long enough from my TRUE BLESSINGS. I know it's going to take alot of planning and organizing for me to execute this properly, which is why I have given myself a deadline of Spring 2007. I don't even know where to start, except to begin saving money NOW. But do I get an apartment first? Get a job first? Ask to room with some of my friends temporarily(but I'd rather NOT)? The only things I know for certain are that I would like to live in a nice neighborhood, preferably the northside and I really don't want a roommate. I am determined to make this happen. I really feel like I'm working towards an attainable goal.

I see alot of you all on here have made big moves from one place to another, any advice or tips?

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Only In New York (Updated)


Well I'm back from New York, unfortunately. Leaving is always the worse part for me, because I love it there so much. I had HELLA fun as usual, no complaints here, well maybe one. I didn't meet the "ONE" yet, but patience is a virtue. Yes, that's me for anybody wondering. I hate taking pictures (yea I'm a thick nigga!), but I thought this one looked decent enough to post. Since I did waay too much in New York, going into detail would take forever, so I'll just do a quick recap.

Note--->words in RED are links

Note--->Anybody traveling to New York for the first time, I recommend using NYC HOPSTOP. It will make getting around 10 x's easier. I had all the directions emailed to my Sidekick. They can even text you directions, or u can call.

Only in New York can I get my favorite cupcakes from Buttercup.

Only in New York could I have met my favorite former America's Next Top Model contestant, Bre. She is now a red head, but I must say I prefer her with her natural dark curly hair.

Only in New York could I have seen the same outfit 30 times in 20 minutes. Wassup with every
dude in SOHO wearing the Bapesta sneakers, fitted jeans, Afghanistan-like scarves around their mouth, wearing a mini Pharell-like t-shirt, with a bookbag or skateboard?

Only in New York can I see
Cammie (Cam'Ron) riding by in a Explorer on 5th Ave.

Only in New York can you literally be bombarded with a different hustle every 5 minutes, especially in Harlem. I swear every corner I turned, somebody was like PSSssssttt.

Only in New York, would I have been able to attend the Tribeca Film Festival. I saw a movie titled Alone with Her. It starred Colin Hanks, son of Tom Hanks. The best part was after the movie there was a Q & A session with Colin Hanks and his co-star whose name I have forgotten.

Only in New York at my favorite store on 5th ave (Sean John) are the clothes just as hot as the salesmen. If u don't like Sean John clothing at least go in there to see all the sexy salesmen and saleswomen actually, I really think Diddy handpicked all of them to work in that store.

Only in New York, is there a Duane Reade every 1/2 a mile.

Only in New York, could I have seen the disturbingly good movie, HARD CANDY.

Only in New York, can u go to Century 21, and literally have to fight your way through the crowd and watch two gay men argue over the last pair of marked down, size 34 Roberto Cavalli jeans.

Only in New York, can u see so many sexy ass Latinos at once.

It's safe to assume I'm missing New York right about now. Quick question, anybody ever been to a place in Times Square called Mars, I think it's on 52nd street next door to Equinox. There was a huge line Saturday night and I'm just curious as to wassup with that place.